Week Two Reflections

I started strong, but the second week proved to be difficult.  Not because I wanted to break my diet, but because my body reminded me of why I had stopped doing these types of plans long ago.

Day Eight:

I didn’t really have much change this day other than enjoying a dollop of Cool Whip on my sugar-free pudding for dessert.  Cool Whip is delightful, but not something I want to eat all the time.  Enjoying it as a treat was nice.

Day Nine:

I really wanted a sandwich so on this day I learned how to make Cloud Bread.  It is not actually bread, though.  It is made with eggs and cream cheese and it tastes heavenly, but I found it was best to eat it the day of making it.  The leftover stuff wasn’t nearly as good.  While I did enjoy the Cloud Bread, I decided it wasn’t something I would make all the time.

Day Ten:

I started feeling dizzy.  Here is where things changed for me on this plan.  I’ve experienced this before.  Dizziness.  Lightheaded.  Weakness.  My husband said to me, “Every time you do this cut the carb stuff you make yourself sick.  I really wish you’d just stop.”

I ignored him.  I don’t advise ignoring your spouse, but that is what I did.

Day Eleven:

I felt even more dizzy throughout this day.  And yes, I was eating.  I was sticking to the plan.  I wasn’t hungry because I was eating plenty of food, but I felt dizzy.  I tried a new zucchini recipe that was pretty tasty, but I couldn’t stop the lightheaded weirdness that was hitting my body.

Day Twelve:

I quit South Beach.  The day started out like every other day with my no carb breakfast, but mid-morning I went to bend over and pick something up.  I nearly fell on my face, not exaggerating.  The room felt like it was spinning.  My husband said, “You are stopping this now.”

I didn’t ignore him this time.

Today would be day fourteen if I had kept on the plan, but I didn’t.  I have added carbs back in.  I’ve not gone overboard, I’ve just allowed some grains back into my life.  The dizziness disappeared almost immediately.

I don’t know the scientific medical type reasons for why my body does what it does, but I do know that once again I have seen that tossing carbs out of my system makes me incredibly ill.  I have to have some.  I need it or my body goes bonkers.

I’ve decided I am done with plans.  Any plans.  I’m over it.

I want to be heathy and I want to be happy, but I just can’t do this to myself anymore.

Food is meant to be eaten, not obsessed over and dissected until there are only bits and pieces left to consume.

I’ve decided to just listen to my body, eat what I know is healthy and what I know I need, but stop when satisfied.  I need to focus on portions and not overeating.

And I need to focus on staying away from emotional eating.

So I tried and I didn’t last and I’m ok with that.  I had done South Beach years ago with great results, but my body can’t handle it now.  My body has changed.  Cutting out foods (carbs) makes me sick.

I’m done experimenting with my health.

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